"AC sprain, separation, or whatever the hell that is," Allen said. "I don’t know, [grade] three or something? I don’t know what that means.

"They tried to amputate it earlier. That was tough. I did some electric shock therapy. I don’t know what that had to do with my shoulder though. They recommended heroin, but I said that was against all league policies, so I stayed well away from that. I don’t even know what I’m doing. Rehab stuff. You’d have to talk to [the trainers] about that."