I fell into a choking-laughing fit as I reached the “wreak holy hell in the process” bit. It’s a great line. And it also makes me need to bring up the Vengance Scale, which is always good.

10.0 — Keyser Soze in “The Usual Suspects.”

(I’ll let reader Verbal Kint explain: “He lets the last Hungarian go, and he goes running. He waits until his wife and kids are in the ground and he goes after the rest of the mob. He kills their kids, he kills their wives, he kills their parents and their parents’ friends. He burns down the houses they live in and the stores they work in, he kills people that owe them money. And like that he was gone.”)

“…And like that, poof. He’s gone.” (speaking of Keyser Soze Adrian Peterson)

• Philly’s Andy Reid will be battling former assistant Brad Childress on Sunday in a matchup Peter King described as “teacher vs. pupil.” Teacher versus pupil???? That explains everything! Do you think Reid tutored Childress in classes like “Screwing Up a Two-Minute Drill,” “Hanging Your QB Out to Dry,” “Dumb and Possibly Damaging Field-Goal Attempts,” “Idiotic Short-Yardage Calls,” “Special Teams Collapses,” “How To Blow Your Challenges,” “Leaving Yourself With No Timeouts” and “How To Remain Calm As You’re Getting Booed By Your Own Fans”?

LMAO

And I’m still not sure whether or not that’s a good thing.