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Where Gonzo Channels His Inner Beyonce

(Yeah, try getting THAT visual out of your head. . .you just try.)

It appears that we've found the reason that Bryant McKinnie was cut by the Vikings yesterday, thanks to our friends at the National Football Post. To put it plainly. . .

He weighed fo' bills
Won't play if you're at fo' bills
No pay if you're at fo' bills
How did he get to fo' bills?

Yes, folks, McKinnie apparently tipped the scales at or around the 400-pound mark when he reported to Mankato this week. Over the past few years, he's been listed at 335. He obviously played last season at a higher weight than that, and was apparently too busy doing all of the different things that he spent his off-season doing other than spending time at the gym to keep his weight in check without the Vikings' coaching staff constantly breathing down his neck about it.

McKinnie was scheduled to make somewhere between five and six million dollars this season, but couldn't find it within himself to keep his weight in check or keep himself in shape. When he was asked to take a pay cut in exchange for remaining on the roster, he refused, and he was cut. To show you just how long the mourning period from McKinnie's release lasted, newly-signed Charlie Johnson has already been given the number 74.

Seriously, if there was somewhere between five and six million dollars on the line. . .wouldn't you find a treadmill or push away from the table or something at some point? I mean, I'm not sure if I'll ever in my life make that much money, let alone have it dropped in my lap over the span of a few months, but if I did, I'd damn sure do what was expected of me.

But, I'm not Bryant McKinnie. And, as of yesterday, Bryant McKinnie is no longer a member of the Minnesota Vikings.