As requested, we have changed our stadium bill substantially. We've moved it from the ideal location of Arden Hills to the Metrodome site. We fully understand that this stadium bill is a bag of ass compared to the Arden Hills plan, but we are willing to compromise, and it's better than nothing. It's EVERYTHING the state of Minnesota asked us to do. It might not be the best plan, but it's a new stadium, and it keeps the Vikings in Minnesota for the next 30 years.
Mr Bagley, you've convinced me. Using my powers of persuasion, and the bully pulpit that the Governor's office gives me, I will persuade the Speaker of the House and the Senate Majority Leader to act swiftly and get this stadium deal passed. Senate Majority Leader Senjem?
Maybe. Hopefully. Whatever.
Uh, ahem. Mr. Speaker?
Eat a used condom. I ain't doing shit.
I have to poop. You're on your own Zygi. Deuces. Deuces, poop, get it?
...
Look, Mr. Speaker, we're at a crossroads here. If we don't get a new stadium, my financial situation in Minnesota is untenable. I'll have to sell the team or move them.
You don't get it, do you?
Get what?
It's far too early for me to take a position on this. I really don't give two hoots in Hell about the Vikings, what I care most about is holding on to my gig as Speaker. Think about it: I only work for four months out of the year, every time I open my cock garage there's a camera in front of me, and no one is more powerful than me.
ORLY? Lester, bring in the Rog.
Get this bill moving, sunshine, or I will remove your balls with a toothpick and a martini glass.
You know, I don't have any problem at all with bringing this bill to the floor for a vote.