Report: No Vikings Arrested Today

In news that is breaking all across traditional and social media, it appears that no Minnesota Vikings players have been arrested today. All players reported to work, are practicing or receiving treatment for their injuries, and then plan to leave the Winter Park facility and go home.

According to multiple sources, Vikings players were seen taking their kids to the bus stop for school, kissing their wives goodbye while promising to pick up milk and eggs from the store on the way home, and then driving to Winter Park for Friday's practice in preparation for Sunday's game against Detroit.

Repeated calls to Zygi and Mark Wilf for comment were not returned, however the team did make an official statement:

"We are aware that no members of the Minnesota Vikings have been detained, arrested, or arraigned by any law enforcement agency, either in the United States or overseas. We are as alarmed by these reports as the fans are, and we vow that we will work with local and federal law enforcement to make sure we get somebody's rear end thrown in the slammer by midnight, in keeping with the highest values and traditions of the Minnesota Vikings. And even though these reports of no arrests are very troubling, we want to stress that's it's still early in the day, and we have yet to get through Friday night. We want to stress to our fans and our sponsors that we will conduct a full and thorough investigation into this matter, and there is still 12 hours until midnight, which gives us plenty of time for someone to run afoul of the law," said Vikings spokesman Fitzroy Higglewiggle, reading from a prepared statement in front a crush of local and national media.

The 24 hours of no arrests is a radical departure for the Vikings, as in recent weeks every member of the 53 man team* has either been arrested, detained, indicted, arraigned, or given a parking ticket, according to sources from TMZ, the unofficial marketing arm of the 2014 club.

*Well, not every member. It just seems that way

We here at The Daily Norseman are just as disturbed by this report of no arrests as anyone else. And as distasteful as these stories are, they do affect our team and we will continue to report on them, as much as we'd like to pass. We've also made the decision, after careful consideration and discussion among the staff, to leave the comments section for this story open. We just ask that you keep it civil, like 99% of you do. Just focus on the fact that no one got arrested, and leave the personal attacks out of it.

We'll be updating this story as it develops.