Wisconsin Man Convicted Of Battery Against Vikings Fan

The story of a man who was, apparently, super triggered at the sight of an inflatable Viking appears to have come to an end.

This story, as you might expect, comes from Wisconsin. Back in October of last year, a man in Madison named Jacob Justice saw an inflatable Minnesota Vikings mascot in the yard of a man named David Moschel. Upon seeing the mascot, Justice did what absolutely no reasonable human being would do. . .he went into Moschel’s yard with a box cutter and started knifing the heck out of the inflatable.

Moschel took exception to this, understandably, and wound up getting slashed by Justice. Moschel wound up getting 67 stitches and eight staples in his face as a result of the altercation.

This week, Justice entered a plea of “no contest” to charges of misdemeanor battery and disorderly conduct. He faces a maximum sentence of fifteen months on each of the battery charges and six months on the disorderly conduct charge. As a part of the plea agreement that was reached, a felony charge of second-degree reckless injury was dismissed.

The lessons here are simple, folks. If someone has a decoration supporting their football team in their yard. . .yes, even if it’s something that supports the Bears or the Packers or whoever. . .don’t go into their yard and mess with it or anything. And if someone decides to mess with your stuff, call law enforcement. We don’t need to hear anything about any of our readers or any other Vikings fans taking a box cutter to the face. . .or significantly worse.